Maybe I’m the only one who has a mythical “Her”, but I doubt it. And really, she’s not that mythical. She’s flesh and blood. She’s real. And she’s killing it in business.

You know the Her I’m talking about. She always has everything together, even when she says she doesn’t. She never makes a mistake in business. She has loads of raving fans and clients.

And you’re following her strategies to a T and still not seeing the results that she did. What. Freaking. Gives?! What do you have to do to have HER success?

I’ve asked myself that question a lot over the past few months, and I’ve realized that there are several reasons why Her strategies didn’t work for me…and why they’re not working for you.


You’re Not Her

The simple fact of the matter is that you’re not Her. You’re you, so you have to find strategies that work for YOU.

If you feel like you’re forcing things with your marketing strategy, then that’s a sign you’re not doing the right thing. And yes, there’s a difference between forcing things and growing.

When you’re growing, you’ll probably encounter some resistance. When you’re forcing things, that resistance is overwhelming. When I forced things, I felt like I had a boulder sitting on my chest. When I grew, I felt a little uncomfortable and anxious, but nothing like that chest boulder.

So if you try Her strategies and they don’t work for you, it could be that you’re just not supposed to use those strategies.

“But Ardelia, Her strategies are common sense. I can’t make money if I don’t post consistently online.”

Ah. Yeah I felt like that, too. These strategies that work for the rest of the online business world don’t work so well for me. What’s up with that?

Remember, they’re common sense for Her. Just because they’re common sense for Her doesn’t mean they are for YOU. YOU may need something different to be successful, and that’s ok. It just means you’re going to have to find it.


Your Life Is Different

Maybe She can sit down and work from 8 am to 3 pm and get all of her work done without a problem. I can’t do that, and you might not be able to, either.

So part of the reason Her strategy may not work for you is that your life is different. I know if She came to me with a strategy that was “Work 6 hours a day Monday-Friday” I’d laugh her out of my house.

On a good day, I can get about 3 or 4 hours of work done. That’s a good day. On a bad day, I can eek out an hour.

And my good and bad days aren’t completely up to me. My kids often determine my work schedule. So if my 2-year-old fights her naptime, I may have 30 minutes less to work that day.

Keep in mind your lifestyle and work time availability when following someone else’s strategy. If you find yourself working more than you want to, it might be time to kick the strategy to the curb.


Your Rules Are Different

Rules aren’t something we often talk about in the online business world, but they have a huge impact on your business and your success. Let’s do an example here.

One of my rules was “I’m always sold to on social media.” So guess what? People always sold to me on social media. I’d get Facebook messages from people I barely knew trying to sell me their whatever.

I even had one person sell to me on Goodreads! Goodreads! I’m NEVER on the platform, but because of my rule, I even had someone sell to me there.

When I mentioned this to my mentor, she said that she never had people sell to her on social, but then she also said she didn’t have that rule in place.

So what did I do? I rewrote my rule. I reaffirmed that I am NOT sold to on social media and that if people reach out to me it’s to connect and learn more about what I do.

If your rules are different than Hers, you won’t get the same results She gets. If Her rule is “Business is easy” but your rule is “Business is hard” then don’t expect things to be a breeze.

Even if you’re using the same strategy as Her and can see that things are easy for her, you won’t enjoy that ease because your rule says otherwise.


Your Business Is Different

Even if She’s a coach and you’re a coach, even if she’s a copywriter and you’re a copywriter, your businesses aren’t the same.

I may seem crazy when I say this, but businesses have different personalities and ways that work best. Featherwild is a laid back, go-with-the-flow business. I tried for months to plan things out to a T, but they’d always end up changing last-minute when inspiration came through.

So I’ve finally realized that for Featherwild to shine, I need to be more spontaneous. I still plan things out, but in a much looser way. This gives me the strategy I need but it also leaves room for inspiration and change.

If your business is more spontaneous but Hers is very regimented, then Her strategy may not work, especially if it involves planning things out in detail months in advance.

Think about Her business’s personality and your business’s personality. Where are they the same? Where are they different? And how can you tweak strategies to accommodate your business’s personality?


You Don’t Know the Whole Story

This isn’t something that we talk much about in online business, but the fact of the matter is that you don’t know Her whole story.

Even when people say they’re being honest and open and whatnot, it’s possible that they’re hiding the worst. The online business world can be vicious if it smells blood, so we strive not to show weakness or failure.

And if we DO show weakness or failure, we brush it off as best we can and cover it up with a pretty story that’s not exactly real life.

So if it seems like Her life is a never ending stream of money, clients, fun, and dreams come true, then I can guarantee you that you’re not getting the whole story.

You’re not seeing the times she’s curled up in bed crying because she doesn’t know what to do next. You’re not seeing the times she’s burned out because of her huge workload.

You may be seeing Instagram pictures from Her Yellowstone family vacation, but you don’t see the fact that she stays up until 3 am to get all her work done.

There’s probably more below the surface that she’s not telling you, and that’ another reason why Her strategy isn’t working for you.


Business Strategy That Works

So what are you supposed to do? If you can’t follow Her strategy and be successful, then what should you do?

Create and follow your own strategy.

It’s really that simple. Experiment and discover what works for you, your business, and your life. It may not be pretty, and you may not make 6 figures in your first year.

But you will be happier and more relaxed. You’ll be working in alignment and will feel better about how you’re running your business. And success will come to you in time.

If you’re ready to kick your cookie cutter strategy habit with some amazing mentoring support, check out my business mentoring packages. They’re from the heart because I know what it’s like to follow “best practices” and still come up empty-handed.

Have you been in a similar (and frustrating) situation before? Drop a comment below and let’s talk!

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